Captain Asspounder's Vibrating Dildos

From HallsWiki

One of the stores in Stovehaven that was originally part of the Comics Midtown, this store was not, as many suspected, run by Captain Family Values. The idea that there may be more than one "Captain" running around with sexual perversions may be frightening, but this is sadly the implication, though fortunately Captain Asspounder has never been seen outside of his store, which presumably sells exactly what it says.

In October of 2006, it was destroyed by the Undead Poets Society and has yet to be rebuilt and reopened.

The store won the 2005 McCrea Award for Best Halls Store.